Dirty!

So recently while idly browsing around the net for H!P related goodies I came across these great pictures of H!P related porn dvd’s. Now I’ve not seen the actual dvd’s but the covers (which I’ve edited for decency) gave me a bit of a chuckle. Firstly who’d have thought there’d be a market for W porn? Well here’s not double of u…

notdoublesofu

It’s strange. I wouldn’t have thought Aibon (whose probably not far off this kind of career anyway judging from her pb) or Tsuji would be the kind of girls to have lookalike porn doubles. I wouldn’t have thought they were attractive enough. However sure enough they don’t have porn doubles as these girls look nothing like them. The fact they are actually less attractive (well certainly notTsuji is) is an even bigger surprise.

Now if you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time you’ll know there’s one person I love more than anyone else. Yes Aya. So imagine my joy at finding these. The first one is the best…

notayaAyaaargh3Ayaaargh4Ayaaargh5Note the Gam scene in that second to last pic. Interesting classy look for the second pic too. You can’t beat (to) the first pic however. The costumes should look familiar after all and even as a non-fan I can recognise a few of them. Actually it’s spooky finding this erotic art (for want of a better expression and really a better expression is wanted) as just yesterday I found this pic of the real Aya…

Oh no why

And for the briefest of moments found myself actually quite stimulated. Obviously I am a very VERY sick man.

Not as sick however as the person who decided that a porno based on dear sweet Konkon would be a good idea…

nonkonThat seems more nonkon than Konkon. The girl does look really cute though.

Finally the other member I saw getting the treatment (and considering the subject matter that really needs rephrasing) was old babyface herself. Yes with Nacchi’s popularity always being so high it was inevitable that she’d get imitated too…

Notsumi

Again it’s more notsumi than Natsumi. Love the costumes though.

Well I guess it shows how popular H!P is/was in Japan. What the girls parodied (which isn’t the right expression but it’ll do) think of it Tsunku only knows. You’ve got to admire the cheek though (and again that needs rephrasing). Plus that Konno one really is good looking. In fact I think she’s the best looking of the lot of them. Ah art imitating life. And I’m sure it is art too. Well people probably spend a lot of time studying it anyway.

Edit: I forgot all about Yo-Yo Sexy Girl Cop. I wonder if there’s an Okada Yui lookalike in it? I love how most sites that sell it erroneously state Rika is in it.

Yo YO YO WTF

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29 responses to “Dirty!

  1. WTF… damn.. the konkon wanna be is cuter than konkon herself… ( in a manner) …
    …. urgh sometimes people are just sick… and i suppose it is perfectly fine too, to fulfill their carnal desires… bah…
    as long as they don’t start with the H!P kids then i am not frothing in the mouth with rage….

  2. Ah the W porn DVD it’s been ages since I saw that…not that I watched it or anything *whistles innocently*

    And oddly whilst I was looking to buy Airi’s new PB tonight I stumbled across a bunch of DVDs of an Ayaya lookalike doing a bit more than Ayaya does in her Alo Hello DVDs, lol coincidence or what?

    And don’t forget the great Gyaruru look alike DVDs, I found them on sale when I was in Japan last. I would of grabbed them if they weren’t so expensive ;p

  3. I assume too much resemblance can lead to a lawsuit? Either that or it’s hard to find a look-like that willing to take-it-off.

  4. I think they’d draw the line at H!P kids. Although if in a few years someone does a Maeda Yuuka dvd…moving on…

    Paul admit it. You were looking for Aya porn.

    I doubt anyone could sue someone for looking like someone else unless they were actually pretending to be the other person. I mean you know it’s not going to be Tsuji or Aya or Konkon doing porn (not so sure about kago) so you know it’s somebody else. I’d guess you could only sue if the intention was to trick people into believing it really was Konkon or whoever. But then I’m certainly not an expert.

    I had to edit the post to add in Yo-Yo Girl Cop. I shouldn’t have forgotten that one as it always came up on searches when I was looking for the original film.

  5. Copyright laws allows “parody” works, so if this can be classified as a parody…

  6. those W-a-likes really aren’t that much like them. but i have fallen in love with the KonKon-a-like. she’s adorable. not as cute as the real thing but definitely close. plus i love the outfit that i don’t think we’d ever see the real konkon in.

  7. The Konkon girl is very pretty. She’s dressed well too. I’m not sure if Konno would ever dress like that but I think she might if I asked nicely. But then I am delusional. :p

    I don’t think Konno would do some of the things that girl does though. Well not on camera anyway.

  8. Porn Parodies of mainstream stuff has been a staple of the genre for years, and seems to have taken off again quite recently. Off the top of my head, I remember there being porn parodies of:

    The Cosby Show
    Bewitched
    The Addams Family
    I Dream of Jeannie
    Gilligan’s Island
    The Brady Bunch
    Doctor Who

    And Star Trek has had over a half a dozen porn parodies over the years, some of them quite faithful to the source material, with renditions of Space Seed, Charlie X and bits of others thrown in as well.

    Erm, or so I’ve heard… 😀

  9. I’ve seen one of the Doctor Who ones. It’s quite good. 😉

    There’s also parodies of many movies of course. White men can’t hump being one. I think parody porn is an art form all of it’s own. It’s like comedic porn or something.

  10. don’t forget the fake moans and overwrought expressions and overacting… i think i remember scotty being unintelligible at one point….

  11. “beam her up, Scotty” URGH URGH KEPTAN!!
    Comedic porn is mainly watched for the absurdity of the plot etc etc… I watched one with a parody of James bond… no prizes for guessing the name of the man with that razor bowler hat…. and it Had a Dr.YES! ( with an exclamation…)

  12. Call me crazy, but I say Randy Spears makes a better Kirk than Chris Pine XD

    I had forgotten about the movie parodies. I believe the recent Pirates of the Caribbean parody series has won several awards, and from the trailers, the effects are really well done (with the skeleton armies being particularly impressive), a far cry from the supposedly cheesy acting and plots of earlier films in the genre.

    As for the Doctor Who one, I think it’s hilarious that they cast a Rose lookalike as a female Doctor. Not sure if it came out before the new series or not, but if it didn’t, that was quite a stroke of luck, so to speak. 😉

    I think there’s an interesting dilemma for non-porn fans when it comes to parodies such as the ones we’ve been discussing in the comments (or indeed, your original post): morbid curiosity as to how accurately they portray the characters they’re imitating, or to see if they’re just cashing in on the look without trying to imitate the personality of the parodied person(s).

  13. OK, you got me lol!

    Well if we’re talking porn parodies, I have to say there’s a couple that I enjoy every now and then. A few years back I got into Misty Mundae in quite a big way, she was oddly so average looking I just loved it :S But I think half the reason for liking her was that she appealed to my cheesey b movie side all her films had poor acting, badly written dialogue and the most damn annoying softcore porn (show me more damn it) girl on girl shots ever, but they were all so funny to watch.
    Play-Mate of the Apes had to be my fave by far, girl on girl plus monkey costumes (I think there was even a camp bright pink monkey as well haha), seriosly how can you go wrong?

  14. When I first saw this I was like, wtf?

    How could someone make porn off these semi-innocent girls.

  15. It’s part of a long tradition. I remember there being a Spice Girls one once. Which, considering the Spice Girls had no lookers whatsoever, really took some doing.

    Then there’s all the film parodies. I guess these are different as they concentrate on an actual person. Even so if there’s a market for it there’ll be porn for it.

  16. Danm I hate how everyone thinks Kago’s gonna do AVs. Just cause she did a risque photo book, it doesn’t mean she’ll base her career on it, she has a lot going for her right now! Aibon would never do porn!

    But wow the Ayaya one and KonKon one look similar! (the Nacchi one looks more like Mika Todd, and the W-just no.)

    What do you maen W isn’t cute enough? They’re way cuter than a bunch of AV stars! (But you don’t seem to like them much anyway so w/e)

  17. I like W musically. I love their version of Matsu Wa and Robokiss is perfect pop. They also did some great pv’s. But would I say Kago or Tsuji are attractive? To me no. Well not physically. As for what Kago does in her career, well that all depends on how her career goes. The recent pb she did was an indication of the direction she could end up taking if a musical or acting career doesn’t pan out. It basically said “look at me look at me LOOK AT ME I WANT SOME ATTENTION”. At the moment she’s getting attention because she’s recently come back and has a story to tell. If this attention doesn’t lead to a long lasting future career in music or acting then who knows. She’s never exactly given the impression of being the most stable or level-headed person. Maybe she’ll have to do another pb for attention. But there’s only so often you can do the same trick before you have to do something bigger.

    Personally I don’t think she’ll go into adult work. That won’t stop me skitting at her for doing a pb that shows her as a skank however. That’s what her pb did. The lighting, settings, camera angles and expressions all showed her as looking like an abused and unhappy sex object. I don’t know if that was supposed to be some kind of statement about her time in H!P or what but it wasn’t exactly classy. Even the sexiest H!P pb’s make the girls look in control. The settings are clean and the poses, while being often very beautiful, never go over the line into being sleazy.

  18. Actually, the pb was months ago, almost half a year. She’s been in 4 movies, written a book, released a single, along with many other things. She was just experimenting, jeez, no one has to take it so seriously. In the revised version of the pb a lot of photos were taken out, and not all of them were sexual (the ones you posted were, but a lot aren’t even in “Super Cargo”).

    I can’t stop you from hating her, but if you actually payed attention to what she’s doing now, instead of getting stuck on the past, then maybe you’d realize she has a bright future.

    She is making a new photobook, but who knows if it’ll be like the last one? No one except her.

    I think good looks are a matter of opinion. I personally think Aibon and Nono are beautiful. Aibon would look even prettier if she had a makeup artist that makes sure she looks perfect every day, but she doesn’t.

    I see that you’re a big fan of Takitty. I agree she has a very good voice, but personally I don’t find her absolutely gorgeous, and I find her personality a bit…boring. (I still like her well enough though.) Its all based on people’s tastes.

    And really, if she were an American star, would you hate her as much? American stars get away with worse every day!

  19. but we’re used to the innocent image H!P have produced.
    we’d except it from someone like britney, amy winehouse etc because thet’s what we’re used to.

    i think most people were shocked by kago breaking out of the girly innocent image we’d been used to, so it was a but of a slap in the face.

    ai isn’t my favourite either. >w<
    like you said, different people like different stuff. ^^

  20. Do I have a blog about American stars? No. Why? Because I can’t stand the vast majority of them for pretty much that reason. That’s part of what attracted me to H!P in the first place. The lack of that kind of western personality. I live in a society obsessed with footballers wives and softcore porn stars (i/e/ topless models made famous through men’s magazines and newspapers). The actual personalities of these people I despise. There is nothing likeable about them. All young personalities seem to have huge egos way beyond their intelligence and actual talent. H!P with it’s idol rules has stars who give off a very different public image. What their personalities are really like nobody knows but the public perception is a million miles away from the typical American (or British since I am British) star. In fact it always depresses me when a H!P member is asked a question about heroes and mentions Britney or bloody Christina Aguilera.

    As for Kago’s acting efforts well I guess there are many actors who make that kind of living. Maybe she’ll make a success out of low budget action movies and so on. Making several low budget movies doesn’t guarantee a long career in acting however. But at this moment in time she is news worthy and that will help her get acting work. Mainly because that very same newsworthyness gets the productions publicity.

    I have never said I hate Kago. I don’t hate any H!P members past or present. That even goes for the most frequent target of my humour, Aya Matsuura. However I never particularly liked Kago either. When I heard she was coming back I was glad to see she was coming through the rough time she’d had. I love H!P so don’t want to see it having a negative effect on someone’s life. She’s had a rough time. Ripped off by her stepfather and with supposed suicide attempts. That’s more than anyone should have to put up with at such a young age. Personally I think she was put into MM at too young an age to deal with the level of scrutiny members had back then. However her comeback has not exactly made me re-evaluate my feelings towards her overall. Her acting has also failed to impress me although I’ve only seen one of her films so far.

    Regardless this blog gives my personal opinions on H!P members past and present. There’s a healthy British dose of humour instilled in the comments that many foreigners take FAR too seriously. So whatever you do don’t read the Michishige at 20 post or you’ll get even more annoyed at my Kago bashing. The thing is, if it wasn’t Kago I was skitting at but some other idol like Koharu or Niigaki you’d probably not be so bothered but then someone else who has them as favourites would complain instead. It’s the natural reaction to finding someone who doesn’t like someone you do. You feel the need to defend the person. You say Takahashi Ai is boring and I’ve read that opinion many times on different boards. Viva la difference. Those people just don’t ‘get’ Lovely just as I don’t ‘get’ Kago or Matsuura. The same goes for Koharu who I adore. Many people can’t stand her. That’s what is so good about H!P. The sheer variety on offer. There is something for everyone. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. Personally when it comes to Kago I don’t really get her. At the same time I think H!P should treat her memory better. Like W should have got a mega best in December like all the other groups. However I don’t think that much of her post H!P career so far. That’s my opinion. As she’s not really my type of personality it’s an opinion that will only change when I see her in a good acting role or doing something that really changes my perception of her. My perception of her at the moment is of someone still rather damaged by life. Her own blog musings only confirm that thought. Just the kind of person who, if things went wrong, could end up being talked into chasing fame in all the wrong ways.

    Mind you, for the record, one of my favourite H!Psters is Okada Yui and I’m forever seeing people saying she’ll go into av. I doubt she will but if she did I’d be hugely disappointed. It’s such a waste of talent to end up simply taking the “look I have breasts” route. However if people are negative towards her I don’t exactly care. It makes no difference to me and it certainly makes no difference to her. If you love Kago then good for you. I don’t. But I certainly don’t hate her.

  21. Hexi – Amy Winehouse…I think I need to have a word with my blog along the lines of remember what happened when S Cl*b Seven were mentioned? 😉

    Actually Rehab is a really good song. Sadly it also became funny in an ironic way pretty quickly. But yeah Amy Winehouse is the typical modern celebrity. Horrible personality imo.

  22. *Claps*
    Four for you Morningtime, You go morningtime!

    and yes, Majority of american stars have bad personalities but there are some that don’t have bad personalities at all 😉

    But yeah, I don’t agree with some people saying ai-chan is boring when she’s not boring at all.

  23. @ Hexi, to be honest were most people shocked by Kago breaking out of the innocent girly image for her PB? For me she lost that image a long long time before she released it, so I was expecting something a little bit more sexual.
    And to be honest that PB is far from shocking. In fact it’s quite tame, but I guess not exactly what we’d expect from our H!P girls though, but then she isn’t one any more, so…..

    On the whole Aibon front (and way off topic) No Heistation is an awesome release, totally hoping she can bring back her musical career.

    WOooooo, you don’t hate Ayay! Now we just got to try and get you liking her Morningtime lol

  24. Cheap Action movies? Only one of the four would fit into that category. One of the other movies is a new Ju-On, which are very popular. Others are dramas.

    There was more to Kago’s rough life. She was the eldest of many siblings, including one with autism, and ad to support the family with the money she made from H!P. So after the scandals, she felt even more remorse because of her family.

    Kago is my favorite, but I like all the members, and I only take it seriously because Kago’s trying hard to make a comeback, and nothing will work if she’s not supported in doing so.

    I love Koha, I think she has lots of personality and puts effort into her singing (though sometimes it makes me laugh) and so I get annoyed when people bash her or any member. Its not easy to do what they do.

    I don’t agree with ‘being tricked into bla bla bla’ Kago is determined to do what she wants, and actually the reason she did the pb was to show that she didn’t really care what people thought about her.

    People make mistakes, but that doesn’t mean they can’t turn their career around. I have no problem with you not liking Kago, but I definately disagree.

    btw-I actually found the sayu post funny. I still enjoy reading your blog, even if I don’t always agree.

  25. I didn’t say Ai-chan was flat out boring, I think she’s very sweet and funny at times too. I just think she needs more spunk (but I think that of most of Momusu now, a lot of them need to crawl more out of their shells.)

  26. With Takahashi I don’t find her boring but I think in a way she takes leadership very seriously. Also I always get the feeling she’s more the…well not exactly shy type but the quieter type. Also I often think she’s misunderstood. Her humour on Hello!Morning episodes was always overlooked despite being quite sharp at times.

    I agree it’s not easy to be an idol. I often wonder just how Junjun and Linlin managed to fit in so quickly when on top of the singing lessons and dancing lessons they had to learn a whole new language. Especially Junjun. At least Linlin had some Egg experience.

    The nature of blogging though is it’s people’s thoughts. I’d never wish ill of an idol but I’ll still say if one disappoints me in some way. Kago’s supporters will carry on supporting either way. However I am neither a supporter or an opponent. I’m just someone who doesn’t find Kago my type of artist.

    Oh and Paul…that’ll never happen you know. Like with Kago it comes down to the personality. Aya’s, like Kago’s, just does nothing for me. Except Aya has that extra dimension where I often find her self-important bordering on smug. Did you see the Yo-Yo Girl Cop extras? They just reinforced the opinion I already had.

    I guess I should also add to all this that my blog is a humorous personality of sorts. That is to say that sometimes I’ll make the obvious joke even if I don’t really believe what I’m saying. Hence I’ll skit at Aya in a way that’s out of all proportion to how I really feel (which is not that much actually. I mean away from the blog I barely think about her). It just becomes a source of fun to take digs. It’s like a running joke. The same can be said of Kanna. She was my favourite member of C-ute but I was always making comments about her hugging. I don’t really think she’s some kind of sex case but I make the joke anyway because it’s funny (well to me at least). Kago doing porn falls a bit into that category too. I personally doubt she’ll ever go quite that far.

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