Morning Musume DVD Magazine Vol 16

When you don’t speak the language dvd magazine’s can seem a little dull. Often it’s just the girls sitting around talking or doing mundane things. Even a subbed dvd magazine isn’t necessarily a recipe for success. Volume 14 was subbed and it’s dull as ditch water. Of course volume 23 was subbed and it’s great fun. However there’s one unsubbed one that is great to watch. Volume 16 has the girls on a coach trip to a fairground…

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They pull cards to determine three groupings…

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The groupings are decided as group A – Cracktacular, Eri and Sexy Panda, group B – Sexy Cat, Sigh Yummy and Linlin and group C – Lovely, Gaki-san and little Jimmy Krankie. Once they get to the fair they mostly split up and there seems to be some subgame where after every ride they roll a dice and get the number multiplied by the amount of members who took the ride. There’s prizes for the winning team members at the end of the day. But before all that all the members do a bit of go-karting with a bit of go-crashing thrown in…

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See a tyre and crash into it seems to be the order of the day. Anyway this seems a good time to mention my huge fetish for winter clothes on women. I love winter coats and scarves and the girls are all dressed accordingly. Reina finishes off her look with an absolutely killer pair of boots that immediately turns on my lightsaber of love. Ahem. So anyway the girls by pulling cards find out what they are to ride first. For Cracky and co it’s a gentle start…

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Whee. I think Koha is in her element. Anyway after the ride they throw a dice get a 4 multiplied by 3 and seem very happy. Then they draw a card to determine their next destination.

Meanwhile Lovely and co get something a little more challenging…

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They’re up there somewhere.

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After the ride the dice is thrown and they get the not too helpful score of minus 1 multiplied by 3…

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Meanwhile for Sexy Cat and chums their first ride is something called a Moonraker…

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So here are the three girls as the ride is about to begin. Yes here’s Sigh Yummy and Linlin…

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And here’s Reina…having a cuppa…

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Hmm…Sexy Cat is more Scaredy Cat it seems. Anyway the ride begins and although I don’t speak Japanese I can pretty much translate this next bit…

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Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh“.

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So in the background there you can see Sayumi and Linlin spinning around. While in the foreground you can see Reina…laughing…

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Evil Sexy Cat!

So after the ride Reina decides that she’ll be the one to throw the dice. Even though she never took the ride. The result is? Oh and check out the lightsaber inducing boots…

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Reina following her poor dicework immediately does a 100 metre dash wearing stilleto-heeled boots. Which is nice. Very nice.

Up next for Koha’s team is a ride on a roller coaster…

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“kowaii, kowaii, kowaii” multiplied by about a hundred.

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Junjun did ride it too but with no camera on board. Anyway while that was going on Ai-chan and co are cooling down…

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Oh lucky ice cream heading onto Lovely’s tongue.

So anyway after that they decide to have some tea…cups…

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After which they discover their next ride…

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Meanwhile Linlin pulls a card and the Sexy Cat team gets to ride the horsies much to their delight…

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There’s an amusing moment before they begin where Sigh Yummy totally fails to mount the horse properly. You’d think the horses were real. After the ride Sayumi pulls a card and seems to have chosen a ride called Web Finger. Or at least that’s what it sounds like when she says it. It’s actually called Wave Swinger. But first some food…

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Oh lucky pizza slice on Reina’s tongue.

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Oh lucky ice cream on Koha’s lips.

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Mmm…boots x 3. The force is becoming strong in this one.

So onto the Crack team’s next ride…

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The view from near the top of their watery journey…

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And remember how much Eri hates roller coasters? I mean have you seen those old Hello! Morning episodes? Well nothing has changed…

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Anyway after that ride Koha and co discover what Ai-chan’s team is riding next. Meeting up with Lovely and co Junjun decides that she’s going along too…

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But what of Sexy Cat and co? Well…

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Well it looks like they are having fun although afterwards Linlin manages to throw a minus 1. Not having much luck with the dice this lot. Their next ride is something called the Zola 7. Which sounds like an Italian’s indoor football team competition but turns out to be some kind of indoor ride we don’t see much of. Although as Reina’s team gets off Lovely’s team gets on.

Meanwhile the Crack team gets to go on the Wave Swinger. Except Junjun who takes a break…

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Then Lovely’s team have a go. After which Reina’s team enter a haunted house. We don’t get to see this but we do get to hear it. Never has a minute of black screen been so funny.

And that’s it. There’s just time for the scores…

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The A-Team are the winners. Hmm…I think that means Koha is Murdoch, Eri is Face and Junjun is Mr T. Reina’s team got minus 4, Lovely’s plus 9 and Koha’s plus 27. A resounding victory there. So there’s some goodies for the winners…

Goodies

Umm…wrong picture…

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Then it’s time to say gooodbye to Cracktakular, Eri and Sexy Panda…

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And it’s also time to say goodbye to Sexy Cat, Sigh Yummy and Linlin…

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And finally it’s goodbye to Lovely, Gaki-san and little Jimmy Krankie…

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Really this is one of those shows where you don’t need to speak the language to enjoy it. The girls are all having fun and their personalities come across really well. It shows up how poor Haromoni@ and Yorosen were as tv shows. Give the girls something to do and they have fun and so you do too. It’s simple really. I’d love to see this get subbed one day though. It’d be even more entertaining that way. Anyway if you want to download go here.

Ah it feels like the one last big post I always wanted to make has finally been done. I’ve long loved this dvd magazine. I feel better for having got that love out there. I think the only other post I never got to make was the Morning Musume: The Movie one. That was going to really annoy people probably. Sadly I just couldn’t think of enough people to play the members. I do remember it was going to be a live action, cartoon and cgi thing. The cast included as Kamei Eri…

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Ms Crabtree. Eri is a very cute girl but at times (especially during part of her Haromoni@ phase) it looked like her hair had never seen a comb.

Also starring as Mitsui Aika is…

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Little Jeanette (Jimmy) Krankie. Perfect casting there. Also to star would have been through the magic of cgi Marty Feldman as Reina and (since he’s now died) Ali Bongo as Linlin…

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The only other member I’d sorted out the casting for was Rika. There was only one person with the chin to take on such a demanding part. Yes it was going to be down to former footballer and football pundit Jimmy (Chinny Chin Chin) Hill…

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Oh yeah and I was going to have some random extra playing Inaba Atsuko. She was just going to stand around in the background a lot. Hmm…perhaps it’s best that I never made that post. I mean imagine how fans of Linlin and Mitsui would react. Oh wait…do they actually have any fans?

3 responses to “Morning Musume DVD Magazine Vol 16

  1. This made me so happy…I didn’t even know about that dvd first of all. Will definitely go have a look. I think Rika’s is the best.

  2. LOL! LinLin has fans. not many but they’re there… but she seems to be more of the subject (victim) of really sex filled dreams…..

    i like Mittsi! Y_Y although she really really does look like that kid/guy/something there…….

    glad to see you’re not complately abandoning us, man. ^^

  3. Pingback: Morning Musume DVD Magazine Vol.53 | Morningtime·

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