And Now The Headlines

Nakajima Saki claims Niigaki Risa’s menstruation cycle is getting a little extreme

Kago Ai trials a new level of internet interactivity

She looks like she’s going to stick her fingers down her throat, you vomit. By the way her new iphone cock app is now available. Wait…was there a letter missing there? Probably not.

Junjun practices for new ventriloquism act

Err…Junjun you’re not supposed to try it with a real person. Move your hand away from there!

The winner of the Sigourney Weaver “Get Away From Her You Bitch” award 2010 is announced

Get off her Niigaki! Ai-chan is my chan!

Morningtime’s new Idol School is opened

Err…you three on the left can stay behind after class for some ‘extra tuition’. ^^

OI! I AM NOT THAT SMALL! Oh that hurts Chisato. That hurts!

A new internet survey* shows chubby cheeked idols are the best idols

* Based on survey of one person, a Mr M Time.

Idol reacts with typically modest disbelief at being awarded the Morningtime Most Beautiful Human in the World Award for the ninth year running

Who me?

The Hello! Project cosplay competition winner is announced

Ogawa Saki’s Tsuji Nozomi impression was the clear winner. Fukuda Kanon came second for her cosplay as Kago Ai although she looked bemused and kept on insisting she didn’t know it was a cosplay competition.

Michishige Sayumi has a message for her haters

“Kiss my a…”

Members of Morning Musume give their reaction to news that Mitsui Aika is actually considered attractive by some people

Reina undergoes trial eye-straightening procedure

“So if I hold my eye like this and you poke me in the side of the head with an open umbrella it should right itself? Really?”

An idol reacts with sweet but modest joy at being declared winner of the Morningtime Most Desirable Human Being Ever Award

“What me again? Aww thank you very much.”

Not bad going considering she was presumably performing trial eye-straightening surgery on Reina at that moment.

Fears grow for Yaguchi Mari as the toll of having worked with Kago Ai for all those years starts to catch up with her

Tanaka Reina taunts fans

“You want this? You can’t have this. Mwah!”

Following criticism that Mitsui Aika’s sporting of wooly hats has damaged the wooly hat industry by making the wearers of said garments look like homeless Glaswegian meths addicts, Hello! Project redresses the balance

Simply beautiful!

The winner of the Morningtime Cutest Pose and S/mile…I mean Smile Award is announced

Meanwhile the Morningtime Sexiest Socks winner is also revealed

Police step up the hunt for the unknown madman or woman responsible for several high profile fashion crimes

The winner of the Morningtime Prettiest Mouth Ever Award reacts in shock

With an “om” and a “nom” and a “nom nom nom”! ^^

Finally applicants to join the Japanese navy suddenly increase five-fold despite the peace

“Despite the peace”. Get it? The Peace! Ahahahahahaaaaerr…yes. >.>

4 responses to “And Now The Headlines

  1. OMG, funniest shit I’ve see since…well, since your post about Mitsui Aika’s horror movies! Great stuff MT!

      • I always dig your comedic posts – you find some of the greatest pictures for them too. Don’t get me wrong, I like to read your informative posts as well as those that are purely your opinion on various things but you have a knack with the H!P comedy.

        On an unrelated note, I just spent about $160 on photobooks I’ve been wanting but couldn’t afford. Hell, I still can’t afford it but finally said f*** it, I’m buying them anyway.

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