Hello and welcome to this live presentation of the prestigious Morningtime Awards 2013. A ceremony with none of the glitz and glamour of a boring awards show that would be photographed and appear in crap gossip magazines. No instead we have idols. Lovely adorable idols. So feast your eyes on the heavens that are these 21st century Japanese entertainers and feel the love, the energy and yes even the doki doki of your heartbeat.
And so without further ado it’s onto the first award…
Most Huggable Idol:
Previous winners have included Nakajima Saki (2009), Nakajima Saki (2010), Nakajima Saki (2011) Taguchi Hana (2012).
This unique idol is so full of mad energy, is so funny and is so damn cute too. She’s a whirlwind of adorability. To see her is to love her. An immediate reaction of “Awwwww. HNNNNG!”
Morningtime Adoption Award 2013:
Previous winners have included Nakajima Saki (2009), Nakajima Saki (2010), Nakajima Saki (2011) Tanabe Nanami (2012. Nacky was too old for adoption).
And it’s congratulations to Sakura Gakuin’s leader and energy monster. A new life awaits her in the Morningtime household. Yes The Morningtime residence will be full of nervous energy and squeely excited noises once Marina arrives. And that’s just from Morningtime spazzing out around her!
Best spin-off unit:
Previous winners have included High-King (2008), Zoku v-u-den (2009), DIY (2012) (no awards 2010 and 2011. Crap years really).
From l-r Sugisake Nene, Horiuchi Marina, Iida Raura)
Energy, happiness, feelgood loveliness. Sleepiece in common with every other Sakura Gakuin sub-unit (bar the heavy metal wonder of BABYMETAL) and indeed of parent group Sakura Gakuin themesleves have all these qualities in droves.
Morningtime Seal of Approval Cutest Looking Under 18 Idol:
Previous winners have included Nakajima Saki (all years to 2011), Tanabe Nanami (2012)
This idol fulfills all the main criteria of being a perfect looking “Morningtime Seal of Approval” idol. That is big lips and eyes. She has stolen the title from Nanami in a close fought contest. It is thought the fact that she actually gets to do something every now and then swayed it in her favour.
Next up the award Morningtime Marvellous Maid (MMM)
Previous winners have included Michishige Sayumi (2010), Michishige Sayumi (2011) Nakajima Saki (2012).
The cute little pixie even provided her own costume…
Nanami should be in a group by now. She’d have made Juice=Juice awesome. I hope Tsunku hurries up and finds a place for her. Until then I have a place for her. Here > ♥
Group of the Year:
Previous winners include Morning Musume (2009), Morning Musume (2010), C-ute (2011), C-ute (2012).
With a concert in Paris and two sold-out shows at Budokan plus with single sales continuing to rise C-ute are finally getting the recognition they deserve. A fantastic, close-knit group with great singers and dancers and a great sense of fun (witness their group photos) C-ute have it all. They are quite utterly charming. The fact that they have grown up together gives them a strength of purpose and unity. It’s also given the fans a sense of guardianship. Watching them mature is a bit like watching your own young family members growing up. Idol fans have that kind of emotional involvement with their favourite members and C-ute provide the perfect example for this. C-ute are the ultimate group. They have been together since childhood (just like a family), they are a good, not too big but not too small number of members (just like a family) and they are all different and yet go so well together (just like a family). You could almost say they are a bit like a family. :p Team C-ute continues to shine and signs are the sun still has quite some way to rise!
And finally the big one. The most coveted award of the evening. The Morningtime Best Idol Currently Active Award.
Previous winners have included Takahashi Ai (2008), Tettekette (2009), Ai-chan (2010), Lovely (2011) and Nakajima Saki (2012).
And it’s the top award for the second year running for C-ute’s cutest. The big-gobbed, big-lipped, big-eyed idol with the cute voice and beautiful figure runs away with the award again and by quite some considerable distance. In fact she ran so far that the other contenders were still in Japan and Nacky had made it all the way to France. What a performance! Nacky is beautiful. She has grown into a fantastic dancer, competent singer (a big improvement in itself) and a confident and charming personality. Oh and a mynx. That too. Maybe she should wear her bikini next time? Hell yes! Of course all this success comes at a price. Sadly Nacky had to tender her resignation as Morningtime’s maid but hey never let it be said Morningtime stands in the way of any idol achieving her goals. Besides replacing maids more often keeps wages down. No need for pay increases. >.>
Special Morningtime Best Idol Ever Award:
Previous winners have included Takahashi Ai (2009), Ai-chan (2010), Ai Morningtime (2011), Takitty (2012).
Yes Ai-chan wins the award yet again. If there was a prize for beauty, talent, all-round amazingness and frankly being a goddess Ai-chan would win it. And indeed she just has. Again. As beautiful within as she is on the outside (stop thinking that you mucky pups. I didn’t mean it in a smutty way). In fact so beautiful is she that I just said something that could be interpreted in a smutty way and I DIDN’T EVEN MEAN IT. A shock if ever there was one. Ai-chan is so wonderful she can even cure me of my punning affliction. All hail the Goddess and her amazing healing powers. For she can cure the heart and soul of any mere mortal. Bow down to your Goddess and give thanks and praise to the lord Tsunku for bringing her unto us.
And with that award the curtain comes down, the idols disperse back to Morningtime Manor for the aftershow party and the world seems a better place.